No one understands your online relationship better than you do.

My long-term boyfriend and I met through Chatous. If you don’t know what that is, it’s basically a chatting app where you can meet people all over the world — just talking about random things.

I don’t know the new updates now, but back then, it didn’t even let you put a profile picture, and people just used a nickname. So basically, my boyfriend and I talked for a couple of weeks without seeing each other’s faces.

The funny thing is, we didn’t even have a clear intention to be in a relationship. We’re just two young people who want to talk about everything about life that no one around us would understand.

So yes, the relationship didn’t truly happen until he flew from Canada to Bali to see me in person. That was two years after we met in Chatous. You might think we were crazy, and I’ve had admitted that too.

But that’s not the point. The point here is how do you know if this online relationship you’ve been having is worth the effort. In case you don’t notice yet, I write a lot about  How Porn Addiction Impact on Your Emotional Health and Relationships

Those aren’t to discourage you but instead, I want you to have more awareness of what’s the  How to *really* know you’re in love  that most people don’t talk about. Of course, it still can work if you’re patient enough to give it a try with one person.

But it won’t work out if you just jump from one person to another in the span of months without actually knowing how to stick around.

People always say building a relationship online is easier because it’s easier to talk with someone through your phone, but it’s actually harder. I kid you not. I’ve been doing it for six years now, and never once do I think it’s easier than meeting someone in person and having a relationship with them.

But how do you know if you should stick around and give your best shot?

People are impatience in finding real love. They don’t want to stick around when things get hard. Three months is the max, and if they aren’t as happy as they thought, they call it off.

But how do you know they’re worth your time and energy?

First, you need to know what do you want in a relationship. What are your values and your goal long-term? For me, I’ve always been into someone who put his best efforts to make the relationship work — no matter how hard it seems.

I didn’t necessarily look for someone who’s handsome and rich. Because I knew those things would be nothing if he didn’t know how to stick around when things are hard.

Everyone has a different list and boxes that their ideal partner needs to tick. So go back and ask yourself if this person you’ve been seeing is ticking the boxes.

I’m sure deep down you already knew it. You just need reassurance that you’re going to make the best decision.

No one understands your online relationship better than you do

When I started having this long-distance relationship with someone I met online, most of my friends were skeptical. I don’t blame them. It’s a normal thing to do.

But then I made a mistake by seeking advice from them. I thought my best friends would know what was best for me. But all they wanted me to do was to break up with him, especially on the bad days when we had a fight.

Look, I’m not saying you shouldn’t listen to what your friends say. If your gut is telling you this isn’t it, plus your friends back that up, then it’s safe to conclude this relationship isn’t meant to last long.

However, if they straight up tell you to let it go without hearing your story and your perspective, then maybe their options aren’t worth considering, you know? Online relationship is really complicated.

You shouldn’t expect anyone will understand it the way you do. Instead, you should ask yourself when you’re in doubt whether you still want this or not.

And that should be enough to get you a real answer.

The Bottom Line

Nothing is worse than being in that intersection, thinking whether you should let this relationship go or invest full time and see how it goes because no one likes uncertainty.

We always want to chase that fixed guaranteed result but guess what? You can’t have that.

When you get to know someone long enough, you’ll get the idea whether this person you met online would be a better fit for you or not, but once you dive in and commit to them, you won’t know the final result.

Are you going to end up in a marriage with them? Or buy a big house together somewhere in Bali? You don’t know. And you shouldn’t obsess with it anyway.

Be it an online/offline relationship, at the end of the day, if this person is meant for you — he/she isn’t going anywhere.

FAQ?

1)How to *really* know you’re in love?