“You need to date several people at the same time — ’cause just in case.”
Are you single and ready to mingle? But don’t know where to start? Don’t worry — I’ve been there too.
In today’s modern world, the first thing people think when it comes to dating again is to sign up on dating apps like Tinder or Bumble.
Though I’ve heard many people say Bumble is a much better place to find a good guy — someone who actually wants to go on a date with you, not just having a one-night stand.
With that being said, navigating this online dating App isn’t always easy. If you’re new, you’ll probably want to make sure if you do the “right” thing by searching for some tips on the internet.
However, I’d highly recommend taking them with a grain of salt. Though not all of them are BS, there are some that are a big no-no, and you shouldn’t waste your time following them.
The Hard Truth About Online Dating No One Tells You
“Women shouldn’t make the first move.”
Girls like the idea that guys should be the ones who chase them. You’ll look cheap if you do the other way around.
I never questioned this when I was a teenager, so no matter how much I liked someone, I just waited until he made the first move but then disappointed in myself when that didn’t happen.
It’s only later in my late twenties that I realized this concept doesn’t truly mean anything. It’s silly to think that girls shouldn’t say “hi” first or even ask the guy’s number just for the sake of maintaining her “pride.”
Once, I’ve initiated a date first with someone from the dating app because I thought he was cool. And the date went very well. In fact, it’s one of the most memorable dates I’ve ever had with someone.
“Men are supposed to pay on the first date.”
I can’t remember where did I start noticing this concept, but one thing for sure is that many of my female friends expect their date to pay for everything — especially when it’s their first date.
But why is that? Does having him pay on the first date make your connection stronger? I highly doubt it.
And the same thing with a guy who doesn’t want to pay. Does it mean he’s a jerk? Not really. It’s the first date anyway.
Sure, it could be something off when you pay the whole meal, but it shouldn’t be something surprising when you both end up splitting the bill.
So there’s no such a black and white rule when it comes to having a first date with someone you met online — making a conclusion based on whether he wants to pay or not is slightly a shallow thing to do.
“He doesn’t have commitment issues. He just hasn’t found the right one yet.”
The rule of thumb when it comes to not breaking your own heart is to never expect a man to change for you.
If it’s your first week talking to him and he already told you he’s only looking for something casual, meanwhile you’re ready for something serious, then it’s better to swipe left.
Many girls fall for the fuckboys and defend themselves by saying these guys just need someone special who can change their mind — which they never do.
He can be the most amazing guy you’ve ever swiped right too, but if you both want a different thing, there’s only so much you can do to keep him.
You certainly don’t want to be that girl who sits there and waits for him to commit to you. There are other guys out there who can offer you just that.
“You need to date several people at the same time — ’cause just in case.”
I don’t know how some girls pull this off.
The idea to date several people at the same time is already exhausting to me.
It’s true that when you’re on the dating app, it feels like the options are endless. There’s always someone new popping up in your inbox.
And as the old saying goes, the more you chase for something “better”, you’d end up with nothing at all. I’m sure you don’t want that to happen.
So pick someone wisely and give it time before jumping to another one. Because at the end of the day, you want someone who is just as committed as you.
But again, you can’t expect a guy to invest when you don’t even do it. Trust me, he can smell it.
Final Thoughts
Going back to the dating pool after being alone for so long is already hard enough. The last thing you want to happen is getting your heart broken again because you follow some misleading tips out there.
If the guy said he doesn’t want a relationship — skip it.
If you think he’s cute — don’t overthink and reach out to him.
If he doesn’t pay the whole mean on the first date — don’t put your judgment too early.
Overall, try to be more flexible without lowering your standards at the same time. You don’t have to follow all the dating rules just because people told them it’s the only way to succeed.
It’s your love life after all.
I write about all things that you might struggle with within your love life. My main goal is to make you less alone in the process.
FAQ Questions with Answers
1)Is it essential to date multiple people at the same time on dating apps?
Dating multiple people can be a strategy to avoid investing too soon in one person, but it’s not necessary. Focus on finding someone who aligns with your values and expectations rather than juggling several matches.
2)Should men always pay on the first date?
There’s no strict rule about who should pay. While some people prefer traditional dating norms, splitting the bill is also common and can help set an equal tone for future interactions.
3)Do women have to wait for men to make the first move?
Absolutely not! Initiating conversation or asking for a date is a great way to show interest and confidence. Many successful relationships start with the woman making the first move.
4)How can I know if someone I met online is serious about a relationship?
Ask open-ended questions and pay attention to their responses. If someone is clear about wanting a committed relationship, they’ll often be transparent about it and show consistency in communication.
5)What should I do if someone I like only wants a casual relationship?
If you’re looking for something serious and the other person isn’t, it’s often best to move on. Expecting them to change their mind can lead to heartache.
6)Are dating rules and tips online always reliable?
Not always! The dating world is complex and individual. Following every online tip may not suit your unique personality and goals. Trust your instincts and set your own rules.1)
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